Are you ready for it?

Oct 6

There’s something about being on a treadmill and hearing a great song that just hits different .

It strikes a cord in your brain and suddenly you’re not walking, you’re strutting. Your eyes narrow, you focus in on the powerful lyrics and you imagine yourself in the midst of a music video.

For me, the latest (albeit not only) instance of this was just a few days ago, and that song was- you guessed it- one of T Swift’s musical masterpieces. I can’t be the only one who hears the introductory beats and immediately is put in a mental space that screams “I’m a badass, F*CK WITH ME!”

“...Are You Ready For It” embodies both the ideas of shadow work and the dark feminine.

She demonstrates this entire inner struggle between two “Taylors”, ultimately breaking the barrier between her two selves and allowing the “caged” self to become free. The words “Are you ready for it?” echo through in a big crescendo and you see the limitation fall away (demonstrated by the shattering glass). Now free, the previously caged Taylor is now at her full potential- which is strong and powerful and maybe even a little frightening. That’s what the dark feminine is all about.

As I felt the spirit of Swift take over my body that evening in the gym, it wasn't just a moment of physical power. I have been stepping into a new era myself, rebranding “Ryan” and what that means to me. Physical fitness and health, my copy business, this blog and other minor but pivotal changes I’ve been making in my life all culminated in that moment and I was struck with the sudden notion that, holy shit, I AM A BADASS.

But even with intense personal power comes great responsibility and great accountability. And it's the latter that’s biting me in the ass.

How easy is it to stick to your guns when you have someone else (or multiple someones) to yell at you? How easy is it to complete tasks and chores when you know someone else is counting on you or expecting you to take care of it?

On the flip, how freaking hard is it to complete something when nobody depends on it but you? When nobody is going to ask, or nag, or grouch, the urgency lessens. YOU have to be the one who asks and nags and grouches, and you have to care enough that your self-nagging carries weight.

So how do you do it?

What gives when your complacency won’t give up?

I had a recent conversation with a friend over the last moon cycle, where we discussed routine and the mundane and how to get yourself excited to complete these boring, meticulous tasks. I gave my friends the following prompt (by Aspen of 17 degrees, an awesome email subscription btw. Check her out *here*): “What is something that makes you excited to be productive? Are there any rituals that you feel make a difference in your approach to work?” And what my friend had concluded in her journal session moved me just a bit.

She said that of course these tasks are boring and tedious and no fun. Most times you can't find enjoyment in doing the dishes or brushing your teeth or writing an essay, or what have you. What you enjoy is the result. You enjoy having a clean mouth. You enjoy being educated. You enjoy a paycheck (duh!), but also the satisfaction of a job well done.

The same can be applied for achieving dreams. You want the result, but all the small-seeming steps to get there are agonizing. And they all add up in such small ways you feel like you aren’t making any progress (which isn't true, it's just the perception). Where do you keep your motivation? How do you keep up the commitment?

These aren’t the questions you need. Ask instead: “Are you ready for it?” That’s the only question you need.

If you aren't ready, you aren't going to follow through.

And if you aren't ready, then you know you have some inner work (robot Taylor vs hooded Taylor, anyone?) to tackle, so GET ready. Maybe put the song on.

Once you come into full acceptance that nobody is going to tell you what to do and when to do it, it’s as if the sky opens up. Suddenly, the atmosphere clears and you’re 10 pounds lighter. The weight (the WAIT) is over.

And then the reality of what’s next hits you: It has to be YOU.

You have to find the strength to hit “Go”. You have to dredge up the courage to jump even when you are scared. And if you can’t? You simply aren’t ready.

As my darling brother-in-spirit said: “Change only occurs when pain outweighs comfort”

Meaning, you are only going to be able to muster the courage, motivation and momentum to change your situation when the pain or stagnancy becomes worse than the comfort your current situation is giving you. But why is it comfortable? Because it’s part of you. Your current self is your “safe” self, and big changes outward often make big changes inward. And that’s scary.

“The more something threatens your identity, the more you will avoid it.”- Mark Manson, author of The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F*ck.

So you don’t. But you desperately want to. The question is, are you ready for the pain, stagnancy, complacency to ebb?

You’re only going to achieve that which you are ready for. That doesn’t mean some innate, doe-eyed belief of being ready. It means thought and determination and pushing past fear. It’s the notion of looking at your undesirable self and punching through the glass. It means you can look robot Taylor Swift in the eye and just-

Wait, no. That's her journey. Sorry.

It means looking yourself in the eye and not backing down. Saying I’M A BADASS and meaning it. Whatever that looks like for you.